I know I'm spending too much time reading other people's blogs & frequenting my sister's grave that I hardly have time for myself anymore. I've also had it with waxing philosophical that doesn't do anything really for me except prove that yes, I may be 'enlightened' (according to Reiki, haha) & even if I am, the world is more fucked up than you think & that just musing about it can actually kill you. I think I've driven a lot of people insane already with my shit. But what else can I do? I'm on the verge of leaving everything behind as my life is as usual crumbling down on me. I can't deal with everyone else 24/7, you know. & the last thing I need is having to worry about my family or my measly belongings. However, the need for peace of mind & stability to save myself as well as everyfuckingthing else is more prevalent than the urge to self-destruct. So I guess that still makes me sane after all? Or am I drowning nonetheless in the same vortex of craziness that's been devouring the world alive for ages?
Forgive me for being so stupid & self-absorbed today.
